Tuesday, May 31, 2011

Forgiveness.

There comes a time when holding on for your dear life has reached it's limits. You are tired, you are so done with holding on. Maybe you're holding on to a grudge, to a memory, to anger...let it go. There comes a time when the weight that has been resting on your shoulders is too heavy to carry any further. With every single person we meet, we start a story. Some are good, some exciting, some sad and disappointing. Sometimes, people let us down. We carry that baggage with us everywhere we go. With every new person we meet, we bring along with us, our satchel of memories, our emotions, our expectations and our anger.
We get mad. We get angry. We hold on to a grudge, to bitterness. Letting all these negative emotions and energies take over the way we feel, act and control...isn't good for anyone. This world deserves better than hate, and you deserve better than holding on to a bad memory that only brings you down. 

With every new situation, comes new possibility. Let go. Forgive others, forgive that person who broke your heart, who let you down, who let you go. It is their mistake, their loss. Forgive your boss for not being a good boss. Forgive your parents, forgive your siblings...forgive others. We all make mistakes. No one is perfect and nothing goes according to plan. Why would you want to live your life through bitterness and anger? Wake up each day with forgiveness and a fresh start. No baggage of old emotions, of old fears...just let it go. 

Life is too short to be angry all of the time. Sometimes we lose our tempers, we get mad...we get hurt. It happens. But don't let it take over your life. A lot of the time, the person we need to forgive the most is ourselves.
So start forgiving yourself. Life is about making mistakes, learning from others and living. To be able to get out there and be real and be you - is hard enough in this ever judging world. It's tough, I get it. So what? Are you going to throw in the white flag and give up? No. You are going to be bigger and better than that. You are going to forgive and not hold on to the negativity, the anger, the bitterness, the jealousy. We all hurt. Sometimes we receive the pain, the rest of the time we're giving it.

It's a balancing act. 

If you can do one thing today: forgive. Maybe it's that person that hurt you long ago, or someone who said words to you that make you ache in your soul. Maybe it's forgiving yourself. We all deserve a break sometimes. 

We deserve better.

Sunday, May 29, 2011

Experience.

"It's so hard to forget pain
But it's even harder to remember sweetness
We have no scars to show for happiness
And we learn so little from peace."
Sometimes things don't work out. Sometimes, all the good things we have going for us, fall apart. We feel as though we've lost everything, we've hit rock bottom and what are we expected to do next? Expected...isn't that a funny way to think of it. Expectations. We all have our own. We define for ourselves what we want, when we want it, how we're going to get it and whether we are actually going to get it. There are two different types of people in this world...people who go after what they want and the people who sit back and watch. They wonder how it's so possible for people to achieve, to set goals...to accomplish.

You can accomplish anything.

Some people go through life not actually living. They are in a daze of what ifs, dreams, regrets and memories. A jumbled idea of what kind of a life they would like to have, but wonder how they are going to achieve it. Who do you want to be? A go getter? Someone who goes after what they want, someone who accomplishes things, who succeeds and is happy with what they have. Or...be someone who is constantly nagging at the things they don't have, the things they wish they had and live their life hoping one day someone will wake them up.

Wake up. Realize this is it, you can have absolutely anything you want. Go after it, you can achieve it.

I get it. This doesn't always seem true. This might not work with a job or someone you love. Yes, sometimes people will leave us and not love us. They will hurt us, let us down. A moment will tear us apart and have us thinking, "was it even worth trying?" To me, yes it was worth it. After all the pain and tears, you are going to learn something from that experience or that person. You are going to be stronger, you are going to decide never to settle. You are going to figure out the kind of person you want to be because of it. You will realize what you want, what you don't want and how much you deserve.

You deserve better.

Things do fall apart, people do hurt us...but everything, everything, happens for a reason. An experience, a person, a moment...a memory can change everything. Life has a funny way of having everything make sense, of having things fall together for a reason. Life is so sneaky sometimes, it's amazing. Good things will happen, granted, so will bad things. But in the long run of life...they all add up to make sense. This is the life for you, this is what is suppose to happen. There are some things you can control, and most you can't. But the things that are within your reach, within your power...take control. Make the decision to be bold, to be positive, to go after what you want, what you deserve and never, ever, look back.

"Sometimes, good things fall apart, so that better things can fall together." - Marilyn Monroe

Don't live your life on the side lines waiting. Constantly we are waiting. We wait for the next big thing, the next big moment, we are never actually being present in our lives. We don't seem to count our happy moments, the amount of times we've smiled in a day. We think about all the heartache and pain in this world, not the glory in it. 

And there is so much glory. So many flowers worth smelling, so many people worth meeting...places we should experience, people we should know, moments we can grow from. There is so much out there. Although you can't see a battle wound from a broken heart, or any  scars from the amount of happiness we've experienced, maybe it's a good thing we don't wear our emotions on our sleeves. To show the world everything we have, every experience we have gone through, would be to give away all our little secrets. The secrets that make up who we are.

I like secrets sometimes. That's the exciting part of getting to know someone new, we all have secrets.

Stop. Smell the roses. Smile. Stop. Stop waiting, stop wanting. Go, embrace life with both hands and go after what you want. This world is a beautiful place, and yes there is much hurt out there but...there is also so much love.

Experience only makes us stronger.

Thursday, May 26, 2011

Holding on.

Courage doesn’t always roar. Sometimes courage is the quiet voice at the end of the day saying, “I will try again tomorrow". - Mary Anne Radmacher

Someone once explained to me the importance of holding on. Holding on to someone, something, a moment, a memory...just holding on. Sometimes, we are so scared of change, of something new, of giving up on something we've held on to for so long. Some will tell you to fight, to keep holding on, it will be worth it, things will work out in your benefit. People will tell you to stay present, to not stay hidden in the past or rush too far forward into your future. I think it's ok to hold on sometimes, but in other moments...maybe letting go is what is best. Things don't always work out, things don't always go according to plan. Letting go doesn't mean you're giving up, it doesn't mean failure, that you didn't succeed. It means you've decided not to settle. You will not give up on what you deserve, because you deserve best. To keep holding on to something, to never let go, would be to keep yourself holding on to something in the past. Be present, let go, let change happen. To indulge yourself in letting go, is not failure.

You have not failed yourself. You have simply let go of what has been holding you back, what you might have thought you deserved or wanted for a long time. Guess what - you deserve more and you deserve better.

Letting go, will bring you deeper into the possibilities of right now. Let your heart be free. What is it you want right now? What do you wish for? What will you go after? What are you capable of?

The answer: Everything.

The possibilities, the experiences, they are endless and forever changing. 
I think it's important to hold on to some memories, to let them teach you something, remind you of something, perhaps be able to bring you back to the person you want to be. But don't let an experience, someone or something hold you back from achieving something far greater than what you already have. This vision of your life, of what you want, of what you think you deserve...it could be greater. You are powerful, you deserve greater. 

Think big.

The importance of holding on... sometimes all we want to do is let go. Give up, crumble into a million pieces. Sometimes life doesn't go as you had planned, actually, it rarely ever will. People are going to break your heart, leave you, let you down. You are going to experience things, people and places that are going to change you - every - single - day. 

Let it change you. 

It takes courage to accept change, to be different, to accept denial. It takes courage to let go, to fall into something new, something different. COURAGE. You are capable. Accepting that things must change, that you must let go, that maybe you have lost - this one - doesn't mean you are going to lose them all. Accepting that letting go is what you need, what is in your best interest, what is right FOR YOU - takes courage.
Sometimes hitting rock bottom is what we need. Something to readjust our way of seeing the world. It's when you have lost everything and you feel at your lowest, when you feel lost...that you are absolutely FREE to feel, to love, to live, to decide on something better, greater, MORE. To take a different road, something new, something fresh, something more. It's when you feel you have lost everything, that you are free to do anything. 

I'm going to be different, I'm going to be real and fresh and exciting. I chose to smile and to succeed, to experience failure and heartache and to send happiness, love and light into this world. I will be positive and help others. I will accept help when it is given. I need others. I'm taking the long way around...and I like it. This is me.

You are constant, breathing, beating, feeling. You deserve to feel. Letting go isn't failure, it isn't the end or necessarily in result of feeling helpless. Maybe you feel helpless, maybe things have destroyed your spirit, your heart, your confidence in the past. But letting go...it can spring your forward. Forward into meeting new people, experiencing new things...and before you know it, your heart can breathe again. You feel like you again.

Life can be hard. Holding on sometimes feels like the only option you have. Holding on makes you a hero, it makes you stronger...right? Not always. Don't be afraid to let go. It isn't failure, it isn't the end. There is more.

So much more.

Wednesday, May 25, 2011

Fear.

"Everybody's afraid of something. That's how we know we care about things...when were scared to lose them." - Shawshank Redemption

Sometimes being scared, being afraid of something isn't always a bad thing. There is always something or someone that can completely terrify us. Someone or something that is so great and wonderful, that exactly what they are and all what they are capable of - scares us. 


Sometimes, we scare ourselves.
It's in the moment that we realize there is something in our life so great, that if we were to lose it, something in us would change forever.

Sometimes we meet people that change us forever.

Let it happen. Change is the only thing that is constant.

Don't be scared of change, of possibility. Never let the fear of losing something keep you from falling head first into something wonderful. It's the truth...sometimes being scared, will show you how badly you might want something. Sometimes, fear is good.

Don't ever think the fear of losing something should make that something not worth it. We hold our heads high, and worry what others might think of us. Don't fall in love, don't go for that job, don't do it...because you might fail.

So what? Fail. 


That's a learning experience right there. How can we be mad if we tried, if we put ourselves out there. How can we be dissapointed in ourselves if we gave it everything we had. If we gave something or someone our all, our heart, our soul.


WE TRIED. 


We did nothing wrong. We actually did the right thing, what our heart wanted. It's one of the things we must realize, in everything we do,  we are never alone. Things that go wrong, aren't always our fault. 


When something goes wrong - it isn't always YOUR fault.


 There are billions of people in this world, and every day we go through our lives interacting with hundreds of them. People change things, people react differently. When things go wrong, it is not necessarily your fault. Do not blame yourself, or your heart. 

You tried. Be grateful. Don't give up.
It shows us we are still alive. It's the pain, that reminds us of how good we have it. It's losing someone or something that let's us know we actually cared in the first place. Being let down, let go, or hurt...helps keep who YOU are in line. It readjusts who the person is YOU want to be.

Never forget and never be afraid.


Life is exactly how you handle it. Your life will be exactly how you make it. Your feelings, your dreams, your friends, your life - they are exactly how you want them to be. You are in charge, so take charge of your destiny, of your future, of the things you want. WANT. Let yourself want things, without fear or failure of losing them. Some people focus on the thought of losing something that they don't ever let themselves think even having it in the first place is possible. Is that living your life? How is that fair to want you want. YOU.


What do you want? Out of life? out of love? out of your career? family? school?

Fall head first into life, let go of your heart and let something amazing happen. It will be amazing, because you my friend, are full of possibility. YOU are amazing.

Friday, May 20, 2011

cause and affect.


Never ever give up on something you've been holding on to for so long.

There is a reason.

Be the reason someone smiles.

Wednesday, May 18, 2011

Do you remember..

"If you don't stand for something, you will fall for anything." - Malcolm X

I've always wondered what it is that drives us. What it is that moves us, speaks to our souls...gets our heart and our passions fired up. 

What it is that keeps us motivated, inspired...what keeps us from breaking down into a million pieces and giving up each day. 

What moves you? What do you believe in? What do you stand up for? 

Every single person in this world is different. Our beliefs are different, our experiences are difference, who and what we decide to be every morning - differs from day to day and each other. That is what makes this world so extraordinary. 
Dare to be different. 

It's the thought of having someone argue against you, disagree with you...and heaven for bid, they might judge you. So what? Everywhere you go and everything you do...people will judge. So what? Let them. If they want to make up an idea or a story in their head about who you are and what you believe in, than let them.  If they are going to try to belittle you, than you are already above them. Their loss on judging you too quickly and not getting to know you, is exactly that: their loss and their weakness.

Every action you do, every word you speak...it affects others. You control the way others feel and how you yourself feel. Control. It is important. Actions spark change, and sometimes they can be louder than words. Think before you speak, before you do. THINK. It is something we do very little of sometimes. Be kind, use your words, your manners. Who you are and how you treat others, is a footprint you leave on the world. How you treat others, affects them. It affects their day, their emotions, their experiences.

You have power. Use it wisely.

What is that drives you? That moves you, excites you? What do you stand for...what or who do you believe in? It's the idea that something so wild and so real can control what you want out of life. What are you going to do with this life that is going to be different, that is extraordinary, that is moving? What are you going to do to be remembered?

How do you want to be remembered?

It is your heart, your actions, your words and all that you are that defines you. Live wisely and and stand for something. Dare to be different. Do not be scared to be who you are, and say how you feel. This world is yours, let your passions rule you.

"God gave us a mouth that can close, and ears that cannot. That should teach us something."
***************


Songs for the day:
The girl - Dallas Green
&
Do you remember - Jack Johnson

Tuesday, May 17, 2011

Better things ahead.


Do not waste your heart on someone who has left you.
Do not spend your time trying to get back what you lost.
People will let you down, they will walk away...and from that, it takes strength.
Strength to pick yourself back up. The ability to trust people again, to feel confident and know that better things will come. 
Better things will come. 
Things do work out for a reason.

You will learn who you can trust, depend on, who will always be there for you. Sometimes you know who those people are and sometimes they will surprise you. 

Sometimes, I like surprises.

Do not waste your heart on someone who has left you. They were the ones who made the mistake, they walked away, let them live with that. 
Your heart is great, and big and doesn't deserve to sit on the sidelines and wait. To wait for something that might never come, would be to waste who you are. 

Do not waste your heart on things or people who have let you down.

"People, even more than things, have to be restored, renewed, revived, reclaimed and redeemed: Never throw out anyone. 
And remember, if you ever need a helping hand, you'll find one at the end of each of your arms." - Audrey 

Who you are is amazing. 
Sometimes, at the end of the day when everyone has left you or let you down, the only person left is you. You are capable of change. You are enough. The silence of your soul, to not dwell on the negative that has come...but to think of all the changes you can make, the better things that can come of this heartache.

Do not dwell on a job you may have lost, a friend who has let you down. It is with failure and heart ache that we learn what is important in our lives and who the people are that matter.
Do not waste your time on the bad things that have happened. They happen.
Think about the good people, the people you can trust, the memories you have and the good times that are bound to come. 

It is the people who have let us down that have taught us so many important things about ourselves.
Know this, accept this, relish your thoughts in this belief. The good times are on the way. You my friend, will never be alone. This life is filled with love and possibilities.

"There are better things ahead, than any we leave behind." - CS Lewis

Sunday, May 15, 2011

Phenomenal Woman

Self love.

Waking up every morning, making the decision to be happy, to be positive, to be thankful...it can be tiring and it can be hard, but we must push past and prevail. The goodness of life is rich, and the gifts you've been given are plenty and powerful. It's YOU. You possess so much possibility for such amazing things. I hope you know you are capable of anything and everything. Today, be thankful for your body. For your legs and your knees, for your heart and your lungs...treat yourself with kindness, treat yourself. Take care of yourself. Without your body...you would be no where and no one. So be thankful and happy, for what you have is the greatest gift of all, life...and a pretty healthy one at that. So love yourself, every bit. You are who you are, if we were all alike, if we all agreed on everything, the world would be an awfully boring place. So be yourself, be real, be raw...be who you are and do what makes you happy. Stand up for yourself and what you believe in.
************************ 
I know the constant struggle of loving who you are and everything that comes along with it. The fight is hard and it is long and it can last forever, but you can't let it win. We are different, and we are beautiful and that is what makes us powerful. You are beautiful, exactly as you are. Make today a good day, decide that what you have is enough and you are amazing. Don't let the world rule you, you are in control. Phenomenal Woman by Maya Angelou is a poem a friend of mine sent me, I hope you enjoy it.


Phenomenal Woman
Maya Angelou 

Pretty women wonder where my secret lies

I'm not cute or built to suit a fashion model's size
But when I start to tell them 
They think I'm telling lies. 
I say, 
It's in the reach of my arms 
The span of my hips, 
The stride of my step, 
The curl of my lips. 
I'm a woman 
Phenomenally. 
Phenomenal woman, 
That's me.

I walk into a room 
Just as cool as you please, 
And to a man, 
The fellows stand or 
Fall down on their knees. 
Then they swarm around me, 
A hive of honey bees. 
I say, 
It's the fire in my eyes 
And the flash of my teeth, 
The swing of my waist, 
And the joy in my feet. 
I'm a woman 
Phenomenally. 
Phenomenal woman, 
That's me.

Men themselves have wondered 
What they see in me. 
They try so much 
But they can't touch 
My inner mystery. 
When I try to show them, 
They say they still can't see. 
I say 
It's in the arch of my back, 
The sun of my smile, 
The ride of my breasts, 
The grace of my style. 
I'm a woman 
Phenomenally. 
Phenomenal woman, 
That's me.

Now you understand 
Just why my head's not bowed. 
I don't shout or jump about 
Or have to talk real loud. 
When you see me passing 
It ought to make you proud. 
I say, 
It's in the click of my heels, 
The bend of my hair, 
The palm of my hand, 
The need of my care, 
'Cause I'm a woman 
Phenomenally. 
Phenomenal woman, 
That's me.

Saturday, May 14, 2011

Countless Someones.

"I want to leave a trace. Some mark upon this world. Proof — visceral or intangible — that what I did here mattered. That somewhere in this grand scheme of things, I did not waste my time on this earth, that everything that was given to me was used, that every talent that I had I employed, that every last shred of my effort and my heart came to bear somewhere in something or someone. Many someones. Countless someones." - CrossFit Lisbeth

CrossFit Lisbeth is one blog I love. Everything is so inspiring, meaningful, passionate. I find you can relate so much of your life to the posts. When I read this one...about having a meaningful life...it hit me. Life...this thing were doing...everyday, this is it and it's a big deal. 

We have a lot more than most and we are extremely fortunate. Every day I deal with people who are going through crisis, loss and heartache...I am empathetic and I feel for them. I send love out into the world, with hope that some day it will reach them. The sadness and realization that life is short and precious, has given me a new outlook and complete appreciation for my life. Each morning I wake up thankful, I appreciate who I am and what I've been given. I want to be big, and bold and raw. I want to make a difference and be powerful. 

I will be. 

I am.

I don't want to get to the end of it all and know that what I was given was wasted and I let the days, moments and love, simply pass me by. I want to appreciate and give and spread, share and love and create. What can you do to make your life powerful? To create change and help others? Think big and think with love...you can make a difference. Set goals and create change within your life.


I am first to admit, I have taken far too many things for granted and spent too much of my time complaining over the smallest of problems. I need to stop thinking of the problems, the worries...and see the big picture. To find within that big picture, everything. To appreciate all the little things that make it so great, so big and so powerful.


This life, this world is powerful. You are powerful.

Help create power within your life and within others. Your life is meaningful. You are here for a reason...don't let it pass you by. 

Be thankful, for everything and everyone. You have touched thousands of lives and help this world see love, every day.


"This is failure. It’s that moment when you realize that a choice you made, or something you did, has fully changed the course of your life. But what matters even more than this truth is what you do choose to do once you know it. The tendency may be to curl up in the fetal position and wait for things to improve. But if you can somehow manage to take a breath and look around you, you might just spot another path you hadn’t seen before. It may not be easy to walk, especially the beginning. But all that really matters is that it’s there."-Sarah Dessen




You want appreciation? Look out into the world. Enjoy the smell of rain and freshly cut grass. Smile at the world and it will smile back. The good will come...even though being patient can be painful...sit tight, it is on it's way. Realize this life is a blessing...and there are miracles around every corner. 


I hope you feel thankful.

Friday, May 13, 2011

Good things.

"We accept the love we think we deserve.”
- Stephen Chobsky

I hope on the cloudiest of days, the rainiest of moments and the hardest of times, you feel love. I hope through all the pain and heartache, you find a reason to smile. I hope you know you deserve love. You deserve to be loved and respected, by yourself and others. You need to realize and believe this more than anyone.

I hope you aren't too hard on yourself.
You deserve good things. Not only good things, but the best things. I hope you never settle. The moment you settle for less than you are worth, you ultimately end up failing no one but yourself. So get out there, and find love. Whether it’s love for your life, your job, love for yourself or even love for another. Maybe you want to find the meaning of your life and find a passion and flame that will never go out. Maybe you want to find that one person you will spend the rest of your life with…just maybe. So do it, get out there and be you, be real and be raw. Open yourself up to experience and change. I want you to feel passion and happiness for your life.

You deserve it.

And maybe, just maybe…you’re out searching for love for yourself. Because at the end of the day, you are still your worst critic when you need to be your biggest fan. So make it about you. This life is long and it’s tough and things won’t always go your way – that is a given. You will never make it through life if you are selfish, but in this case, think about yourself. Go searching for what will make you happy, what will make you feel loved…maybe just go on searching to find nothing, nothing at all but happiness. To appreciate everything you encounter and understand that the quest for self-happiness, comes from self appreciation, self love and sending love out into the world. Take each day as it comes, and send as much love out into the world, smile at strangers and walk with a sense of confidence. This life is yours, you are in control and happiness and love – they are on the way.

In the end, you want to do what makes you happy and be with who makes you smile.

On second thought...maybe if we stop searching and trying so hard, maybe if we just left life to unfold how it must, appreciating and being thankful for every day…maybe then it will show up,  clear as day: the love we were meant for, the love we deserve. 


And not only good things, but the best things.

"My life is damn near perfect, but every once in a while I think about 'that guy', and the fairytale thing we once had. I wondered if we'd still be together, because the minute it got hard, the minute it stopped being a fairytale, I cut and I ran. Real life is hard. Real life takes work. Real life is sometimes thoughtless and mean, but that doesn't cancel out the love. So if you don't love this girl, walk away. But if you look at her and you know she's the one, you owe it to yourself to give it a second chance.” 
- Private Practice 

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