Coulda

"My friends, love is better than anger. Hope is better than fear. Optimism is better than despair. So let us be loving, hopeful and optimistic. And we will change the world." - Jack Layton

Isn't it always better to look on the bright side? A lot of the time, we'll most of the time, I find we spend our days wasted away wondering and day dreaming of how green the grass really is on the other side. So what? We wish, we hope, we want, want, want. If we are constantly flooding our minds with thoughts of all the things we wish we had, we want, or don't have - this world is going to seem a little gray. Who would chose to be negative, grumpy and pessimistic over cheerful, loving and optimistic? Why would you honestly want to start your day wondering what is going to go wrong, or worrying about all the things that might happen. Who wants to start their day worrying about the storm that might never come?

It's the coulda, woulda, shoulda's, is what they are. Thinking too much about what we should have done or said, or ultimately how we could go back in time and change things for the better. But guess what? All we have is right now. The here, the real, the now. It's all we've got. The things that happened in the past, they happened. So what? They've shaped you, they've changed you, maybe they've defined you. You can either hang on to it right now or move forward and start fresh. This is up to you, isn't that great? We chose what we want to define us, what we want to keep and what we want to share. It's our experiences and our memories that make up who we are, the people we surround ourselves with. What it comes down to, is who you are right now, and guess what? Who you are right now, really isn't that bad. Look how far you've come, what you've accomplished! You've done pretty well for yourself. The big idea is just being the greatest you you can be. And that involves in looking forward, knowing good things will happen, that the good will eventually come. And if it doesn't? We go after it. We are do-ers, go get-ers, dreamers and achievers. if there is something that lights up our heart, we are going to achieve it. 

"Go after your greatest fears. Conquer them, accept them, crush them. There you are able to live your greatest life."

We waste a lot of our time walking into a room already thinking there's something wrong here. If you believe something is wrong, you're probably going to make something wrong, think something's wrong, or even do something wrong. You give power to your thoughts, your expressions. If you walk into the world thinking you're never going to make it, it's going to come right back to you. If you walk into a room thinking you're never good enough, you give those words power, and everyone is going to treat you like you aren't good enough.

The way we treat ourselves, the way we think about ourselves, for the most part is false. We find it easiest to hate on ourselves, be mean, and break ourselves down. If we constantly are telling ourselves these negative lies about ourselves, we give these thoughts power, and sooner or later, people are going to start agreeing with our lies.

This needs to stop here.

Stop starting your day thinking the world is going to fall. Start it by knowing there is love in this world and you have so much to give. Know that good things are going to happen, they will come. And if they don't? Go after them! Stop sitting, waiting and wishing, go after your dreams, do what you want, and smile. Please, please, please remember to smile. Not just with your face, but your whole body. Smile through your soul, through your toes and you heart. Really show people who you are, and no doubt, you will shine.

Showing up.

"Too many people miss the silver lining because they're expecting gold." - Maurice Setter

It's about showing up.

This is your life, right here, right now. So be here. Show up and be present to your relationships, your job, your passions. You need to dive into your life and realize all things are possible. You need to be a YES. A Yes to you can succeed, a Yes to you can do anything, a Yes to taking on the world. 

Saying negative thoughts won't get you anywhere. The way you think and treat yourself, is what the world is going to give back to you.

It's something important to think about: The power of your thoughts, of your words. Just thinking you're not good enough, that you can't do it, gives these words power and meaning. If you go into the world thinking you're no good, that is how people are going to treat you. You need to realize you are amazing and perfect just as you are. Where you go, you are. You will be forever changing, evolving, growing and learning. But you will always be You, and that is a good thing.

So if you have a problem? Fix it. Mad at someone, hurt, let down? Confront them. Things not working out just the way you had been dreaming? Change it. That is the beauty and the power of it. We can change, fix, swap or remove things. We need to stop being so scared of what others might think, or so cautious of our actions. We are our actions, we have the control, the power. So stop complaining about your world and change it. Define it how you like. You chose who gets to be part of your world, what you are going to do, and where you are going to go.

The beauty of it: You decide.     Always, always, always.

What it comes down to is you and the amount of love you need to give yourself. The answer is: always more. When self love is doing its part, the rest will sure follow. So decide to be present to yourself and give you what you deserve, which I find for the most part, is not nearly enough. 

"Pain is inevitable. 

Suffering is optional."

You need to decide to be present to your life, to actually be in the moment and just be there. Realize this is the moment, and it's perfect and exactly how it is suppose to be. Things happen for a reason, people will come and go, conflict will come up. It is you who decides how to handle these things. Being present is being fair to yourself and to others. You owe yourself this much to actually be able to enjoy your day, your relationships and actually get things back from them. Decide you can do things, you can change the world. The power is You. The things that happen to us do not define us, it how we decide to handle them. It is through our actions that we can produce change.

So the answer to all: love, love love.

Mediocre

Mediocre: me-di-o-cre: Of only moderate quality; not very good, something only average.

Average: a-ver-age: lacking exceptional quality or ability; "a novel of average merit"; "only a fair performance of the sonata"; "in fair health"; "the caliber of the students has gone from mediocre to above average"; "the performance was middling at best"

A lot of the time we settle. We sit back and we watch, we listen, we just accept what is happening in front of us.  It’s what we’ve been taught to do through constant repetition. We have learned to accept, to let things be, that there is no way past it so we might as well leave things alone. Most of the time, this is the right attitude, to accept, to keep trucking when things aren’t going so peachy our way – but this isn’t always the case. We need to pick our battles appropriately and actually fight back sometimes. Fight back against that little voice in our heads saying we are average and not deserving of greatness.  We aren’t always supposed to sit back and let life pass us, let the good things happen to everyone else, to let the world seem only so-so and alright. Too often lately, I find we are settling, for a mediocre life, for everything to seem just average.

"Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate.
Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure.
It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us.
We ask ourselves, Who am I to be brilliant,
gorgeous, talented, fabulous?
Actually, who are you not to be?
You are a child of God.
Your playing small does not serve the world.
There is nothing enlightened about shrinking
so that other people won't feel insecure around you.
We are all meant to shine, as children do.
We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us.
It is not just in some of us; it is in everyone.
And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously
give others people permission to do the same.
As we are liberated from our own fear,
our presence automatically liberates others."

We chose to accept what upsets us, what brings us down, what holds as back as the inevitable and the unchangeable. Allowing the thought that ‘this is it’ and there is no way out, that things must be this way. So we settle. We settle into the negative, into the unhappy, unfulfilling world we have done so well to create for ourselves.

Little did you hear…. The world WE have created for ourselves. That is exactly it, this world, this life, we create. We can either chose to accept or deny, move forward and pursue more. MORE, sometimes all we want and all we need is more. So fight for it. It's a constant act to fight for your life. To be positive about what life throws at us and to not settle for second best. We need to push through the pain and the setback and go after the best life we deserve, the best life we want. We all have a vision for ourselves, what we want, who we want to be. Who says we cannot have it? We need to learn to settle for nothing more than what our hearts truly want.


The bigger the dream, the bigger the challenge. Our hearts, they need a challenge. We need to learn to dream big and fight for what we want. To no longer settle in unhappiness and average, for we are nothing close to mediocre.


We are powerful, sensational and capable.

Most of the time we find ourselves sitting back and letting others strive, and move forward and be happy because we are scared to do well, to do better than others. We are afraid to succeed, but most of all, we are afraid to fail. Failure is part of life, of growing, of moving forward. We have to fail to learn what to do different or what to keep doing more of. 


Failure is important. It’s the fact that we think if we put ourselves out there, to this vulnerable, unknown state,  that this is the ultimate terror. The thought of failure, to be so vulnerable in an act that the outcome is unknown actually keeps us from never achieving and moving forward in our own lives. Let others succeed, let others fail. This way, we stay right where we are. Exactly that, if you decide NOT to try, you are never going to move forward, you'll be stuck right where you are. We are so scared to fail, that we avoid putting ourselves out there, we avoid allowing the GOOD to happen to us, for us to get MORE out of this world, to keep moving up in this life.


We refuse the GOOD to happen to us, because we are so scared to fail.

But we are human, we are vulnerable. This is a good thing. This gives us emotion and drive, and most of all it gives us heart. We need heart and passion in order to survive in this world. Along with this, comes fight. We need a drive and a fight in our souls in order to make us want something, to want something more than what we’ve been given.

To settle would be to waste what gifts we’ve been given. I find to often people think they are weak, un important, that they are a mediocre person with a mediocre life. They think - this is it.

I will tell you this – I will never have a mediocre life. I will never settle. My life is going to be full, powerful, passionate and filled with greatness. There is absolutely nothing mediocre or average here. I will keep pushing, keep growing, keep failing until I finally get it right. My days are filled with surprise and new beginnings; each moment is fresh and energetic. I learn from experience and have no idea where my life will lead me…but I promise you this: my life will be rich and filled with love, absolute and positive fresh love.

"Stop worrying if you're going to be successful or if people like you. The more you stress about these things, the less they happen."

Sometimes we find ourselves in a funk. We are negative and angry at the world. This is normal. So go ahead, curse the sun and the sky and be mad. Let it out and let it be. Sometimes, all the negativity in our lives builds up and breaks us down. This is only temporary. So what, the anger wins. Let it, for a moment. Embrace your emotions, they show you you care. You will bounce back. You will regain your heart, your hope and your energy. The good does come, it just takes work, because life takes work. This we need to understand, we need to accept. Life takes effort and it is worth it. No matter what they say or what you think, life is worth it.

Chose to believe in your abilities, in the possibilities of your life. Don’t settle into mediocrity, don’t assume your life won’t get any better. You make your life what it is, you decide who you get to be, what you will achieve.


So dream big, go after what you want. You can have everything.

Don’t sit back, don’t settle, don’t agree on mediocrity. Chose to smile, chose positivity, to be thankful and full of excitement for your life.

Your life is full and positive and delightful.

We have an energy within us that needs to be spread, that needs to be re-energized, re-fueled, and re born every now and then. We are allowed to lose hope, if only we promise to regain it one day soon.

The good days come with the bad, the negativity is always surrounded with the positive, we just have to fight for it. And I hope you do fight. That you fight for a life you want and one you deserve. 


And I hope you know – you deserve nothing but the best.

‎"Bitterness and un-forgiveness stops you from moving on in life and blocks blessings."